Elisabeth's Pen

What happens when you don't like the sound of your own voice? What a complex thing to attempt to hone a sound to the point it resonates sweetly in the singer's ear. I wish I could open my mouth and have Johnny Cash's voice come out . I have a tendency to hold long notes because sitting in an auditorium once, people erupted in thunderous applause after hearing a performer do just that. I also like the way it feels in my throat. When I started playing guitar it was all about my voice because that was my strongest asset; I wanted to drowned out the bad playing. Now, I want to marry the two. It's like a blend of dark and light at dusk creating a comforting glow in the sky. I have a song in me, and for the past few months I have drowned it out, let my guitar collect dust in the corner. Last night I was inspired: I watched Walk the Line.

 The first time I remember hearing Johnny Cash's voice I was 17. I was in the car on some highway in Oklahoma with my big brother, Cale, whose musical tastes know no bounds. When that bullfrog, baritone voice came through the speakers I was awe struck. Most of the time when I admire an older man, I have linked it back to my admiration for my Dad. He didn't sing all the time, but we would sing hymns riding horses together when I was a little girl, and his voice was deep and scruffy. Somehow, it was like hearing my Dad singing to me the first time I heard Johnny Cash's voice. The more I found out about Cash, the more I liked him.I appreciate men who are no non-sense.

"Why are you always wearing black? Are you on your way to a funeral?" they would ask him.
"Well maybe I am," Cash replied.

Then he would answer with his music.

"Well you wonder why I always dress in black, why you never see bright colors on my back? I wear it for the thousands who have died, believing that the Lord was on their side."

Aaaaahhhh! I love that. I would never be a politician - or a pastor - you're expected to be squeaky clean with no room for error, when the truth is we are all born with error built into us. I would MUCH rather be a broken musician, transparent about life, able to identify with thousands who have have experienced heartache, giving them the most powerful medicine the world has to offer: music. Thank you God for giving us Johnny Cash.